Love: Simply Remind Them

May 19, 2008

Everyone goes through bouts of feeling less than, questioning maybe something they did, or perhaps who they are. In uncertain times, it’s easy to have self-doubts of where you are going, or worse yet, realize where you are.

When you love someone and you see them hurting, it’s tough to stand by and watch. You want to fix it. You want to come to their aid, by their side, and fix the situation or sometimes, try even to fix them.

I want to challenge you to try something.

Simply remind them.

Remind them of who you know they are on the inside. Remind them of the gifts, qualities and strengths you have always admired in them. Remind them of a situation you’ve seen them go through before and solved on their own. Remind them of the knowledge they possess inside and the abilities they have to overcome anything – a situation, a doubt, a problem, or anything they might think of themselves.

Remind them you are on their side.
Remind them you love them.
Remind them that you believe in them.

The most compassionate love is when you can remind those you love of the person you know them to be. There is no need to tell untruths or pump someone up with exclamations of power or grandiosity. That may feel right in the moment for you but when you are the one hurting, all of that seems like a band-aid of sorts that may not feel quite like it fits right over the wound.

It is hard not to go into fix-it mode. But with kindness, compassion, and generosity of spirit you can truly mend a broken heart with your love. Not with hope or hype… but with truth, honesty and certainty.

And that is the truest form of love we could ever know.

Remind them.